


Never Let Me Go

by angelsandguns



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2018-12-06 13:49:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11601939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsandguns/pseuds/angelsandguns
Summary: After a long hunt, Cas confesses that he’s been watching over Dean's dreams and making sure they are pleasant and Dean realizes he can't hide his feelings any longer.





	1. Chapter One

Dean let out a sigh of relief and plopped himself down on the cheap motel bed, ignoring the way the springs groaned under his weight. This is was the only time he'd gotten to relax in the thirty-six hours they'd been on the hunt. 

"I have never been so happy to lay on a crappy motel bed in my life," Dean said. The corner of Cas's mouth twitched at that. Dean lifted his head to peek at Cas, who was covered in dirt and his own blood along with some vampire's. "Man, I don’t know how you're still on your feet."

"Angel's don’t nee—" Cas started. 

"Yeah, I know, angel's don’t need rest," Dean interjected. "But, angels do need showers so you should go do that." Cas nodded in agreement and made his way over to the bathroom, turning on the dim, flickering light to reveal a somewhat clean bathroom.

While Cas started the water, Sam came back from unloading the impala and copied Dean's motion of collapsing on the bed. He let out a huge sigh of relief and Dean nodded. 

"Best thing ever, right?" Dean asked. 

"Yeah," Sam replied, voice muffled by the pillow his face was stuffed in. He didn't want to move or talk to for the next twenty-four hours. After a few minutes, Cas came out in a white t-shirt and his black pants, the smell of the motels miniature lemon-scented shampoo wafting out of the door. 

"Sammy," Dean groaned. When he got no response he grabbed one of his throw pillows and chucked it in Sam's direction, hitting him in the side of the head. 

"Screw you," Sam said into the pillow. 

"It's your turn to shower." 

"Why don’t you shower?"

"Because I don’t want to get up."

"Oh and I do?" 

Eventually they both got in the shower and the motel room smelt less like blood and death and more like dust with a pinch of lemon. After the boys had settled down for the night and Cas thought it safe, he sat down on the right side of Dean's bed. Dean didn't have to open his eyes to know why his bed had shifted. 

"You good, Cas?" Dean asked groggily. 

"My apologies, I didn't mean to disturb you. I thought you were asleep," Cas responded. 

"Well, why are you sitting on my bed?" Cas looked down in his lap, not sure if he should respond. He didn't want to make Dean uncomfortable. 

"I just needed to rest my feet," Cas lied. 

"Cas, I don’t even have to open my eyes to see through your bullshit." Cas shifted and Dean opened his eyes with a sigh. "If you're not gonna tell me what's wrong the least you can do is get off my bed." Cas had been around Dean long enough to realize that was him voicing his concern and not being a jerk. Dean continued to stare at the silhouette of the top of Cas's head as Cas opened and closed this mouth in deliberation. 

"Lately I've been watching over your dreams...you have enough nightmares while awake I just wanted you to be able to have the night to rest soundly. When a nightmare comes I'm able to...send it away," Cas explained, with a wave of his hand, not taking his eyes off his lap. Dean's heart skipped a beat. 

"You know you don’t have go all Djinn on me, Cas. I can handle a few bad dreams," Dean said, trying not to sound snappy. 

He usually would react in anger and would kick someone out of the room if they told him that they were doing something like that for him. He typically would not want to show that he needed people like them, people that cared enough to do that. But the warmth that was flourishing in his chest; that was a different feeling and it made him act otherwise. Dean could sense Cas's anxiety, worried of Dean's reaction. He wasn't expecting the sudden urge to comfort Cas, to hold onto him and never let go. Dean's eyes dropped down to the plaid, tattered comforter, focusing on how many rips that had later been clumsily sewed together that he could count. Anything to keep him from looking at Cas. 

"I didn't mean to—"

"You didn't," Dean interrupted, sensing where he was going. "You're fine, Cas. You're..," Dean drifted off as he noticed Cas hold on the bed and suddenly the comforter wasn't as good of a distraction and all he could focus on was Cas's hand. 

All he could focus on was the way that his ring finger was slightly shorter than his index finger. How warm they would feel in his. Before he knew it his hand was reaching out to touch his hand, to hold on and never let go. As soon as he realized what was happening, he violently jerked his hand back, getting Cas's attention and he tuned to make eye contact with Dean's terrified ones. Cas was about to ask if he was alright but Dean had already thrust the comforter off of himself and was making his way across the room. 

"I need some air," Dean choked, before throwing the door open, welcoming the freezing air that flew in.


	2. Breathe You In

Dean couldn't breathe. Cas's hand was right there and it had taken all the restraint that he had to not grab onto it and never let go. He's never felt this way, especially not for a dude. This had to just be a strong friendship. What had Cas called it? “A profound bond“. Dean chuckled at the memory, remembering how offended Sam was. Dean had felt an urge to revel in the fact that Cas liked him more, that they had a bond. But, his immediate reflex was to brush it off because he knew in this life he couldn't afford to be attached to anyone romantically. His subconscious just failed to mention that it was romantic feelings that he felt. Not that it would've mattered; he would've still kept it inside and shoved it deeper and deeper until it turned into a ticking time bomb for this moment. With each jagged breath Dean remembered every moment, every fight, every hug, every time he had to step out of the room because the thoughts were coming back...everything. 

"Dean?" Cas's voice came from behind him. Dean cringed and turned away from the voice. 

"Go away, Cas," Dean said, sounding more aggressive than he would've liked but Cas was taking away his ability to breathe and he needed to be as far away as possible. There was a moment of silence. 

"You're hurting, Dean. I can't just leave," Cas said. Dean could hear the concern in his his voice but he could also hear that he was hurt. Hurt because he was worried that he had done something to cause this. It took everything in Dean to not go over and reassure him. He knew if he did that his restraint would be thrust out the window and he would...he would do something really stupid. He didn't want to think about what that stupid thing would be. 

"Dean, please, whatever I did—"

"You didn't do anything Cas," Dean hissed. Cas cringed at the tone in his voice. Dean sighed. "You didn't do anything," he said more calmly. 

"Is there something I can do to ease your anxiety?" Dean squeezed his eyes shut. He was suffocating the railing he was holding onto and it was beginning to hurt. 

"Just...leave, please," Dean pleaded. Cas nodded. 

"If that's what you want," Cas responded and began to turn away. Dean's breath became erratic again and he really felt as if he was going to break the railing. Cas turned his head back around to see Dean's shoulders rising and falling quicker and quicker. After debating for a few seconds he decided he cared more about Dean's wellbeing than pleasing his wishes. He slowly made his way over to Dean. When he was close enough, he placed his hand on Dean's shoulder reassuringly.  
"Dean." 

That was it for Dean's restraint and he quickly found Cas's lips with his own. At first he felt Cas freeze against him but his lips soon found their way around Dean's bottom lip. It felt like a floodgate of euphoria had opened inside Dean and he was drowning in it. He reached up to tangle his hands in Cas's hair and pulled him closer to him. Dean needed all of him, every inch of him, and he needed it now. His lips were so soft and they fit into his like a puzzle piece. 

Cas pulled back to catch his breath but Dean couldn't stop. He brought his lips down his neck and Cas leaned his head to the side, having no problem giving him easier access. Dean kissed down to his collar and frantically unbuttoned so he could have more skin to get his lips on. He wanted to kiss every square inch of his body until he couldn't feel his lips. Cas grabbed his face and pulled him back in for a kiss, both still out of breath but neither of them cared a bit.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments or kudos if you enjoyed so far :) new chapter will be up soon


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